Growthtrac Community

[SAM]

I will continue to pray for you and your marriage.

[km]

SAm (and all you other faithful prayer warriors here) -

I do greatly appreciate your prayers for me and my marriage. I sometimes fear that this is the only thing that will turn it around (I would hate to have to have some grand crisis or disaster hit to shake things up and set the stage for change - although I do sadly admit to having those in my past as seemingly the only way God was able to get through to me).

God has worked mightily in my life - often in ways only visible/discernable years later.

[DeerSeason]

I am looking for suggestions as to how others have gotten a spouse who is utterly disinterested in marriage counseling to go for it.

Each time I have suggested doing anything over the years (MC, seminar, online course, etc.), it has been met with utter disinterest to outright hostility. I am wondering what others may have done that worked.

Try to get it. Engage others to talk to her/him. Don't wait.

I was in similar situation two years ago. Marriage not good, getting desperate... arranged a Retrouvaille weekend, wife refused to go. We had a fight a couple weeks later - I was working out of state, home on weekends - that got physical (her slapping, me grabbing her). Shocked & scared, I told pastor the story next morning, and left town for work - wife and I talked on phone - she told me I could come home next weekend - and upon coming home I see the house painted - we never discussed painting the house! - and the cops waiting for me. Restraining order. The next year saw job loss, savings burned on attorneys (I hate 'em) and divorce now looms. We've never even had a single substantive conversation about the fight, and marriage probs; she resorted to expensive lawyers (thanks, father in law) and refused any mediated conversation. I've since learned that the state and courts are evil, biased, and have ZERO interest in 'justice' or reconciliation.

It's true - men are stoopid, but women are evil. And I'm not surrendering my children.

[SAM]

Do you have trusted Christian friends who you could meet up with together, who would be
willing to speak truth into both of you about what a Godly marriage looks like?